Yes, I've Taken My Meds Today

Yes, it's been a while. Yes, I suffer great guilt over not blogging. Yes, my head is pounding right now (how can you tell you may have an aneurysm?). Well, here goes...

Since I've last posted it has been the Christmas season while subbing at least 3 days a week and getting the girls to and from school and Chris to and from work and shopping and wrapping and NOT finding time to get my hair cut and getting to and from the airport a few times and not getting any Christmas cards sent, which means I've really dropped off of other peoples Christmas card lists, and trying to spend as much time as possible with my kids since it's the first time in 4 years we've all been together at Christmas and knowing that Michael is going into the Army medical corps on February 22, and who knows when we'll have a Christmas with him again, while trying to get the boys to weed through all the stuff in their room and pry them away from gaming with the girls to get them to do so and not getting around to making our yearly gingerbread house but the girls made one at YW's and we arrived home the next day to find that Charlie had gotten up on the table and eaten two walls of Allison's house, which spent the rest of the season jauntily propped on styrofoam cups and being thrilled that my niece Amanda and her husband David came up on Christmas Eve for a visit and Amanda was SO nice to bring her camera and shoot about 150 photos of my family, REALLY regretting not having my haircut, to try to get out to other family members because who knows when we'll all be together again and feeling the guilt of NOT blogging and NOT calling people and NOT helping Allison bake some cookies so we could decorate them and she could give some to her boyfriend for Christmas and having the dough hanging around in the refrigerator for three days before finally getting to it at 10:30 on Christmas Eve after getting her, sad, out of her room so we could read our traditional "Polar Express" on Christmas Eve so we could ring our sleigh bells and see if we could still hear them and know we still believe in the magic of Christmas and NOT cleaning up after ourselves, and leaving a note to let others know not to fret about it, because after unwrapping presents we made some more cookies and dipped pretzels in caramel and chocolate, again, so she would have an offering for afore mentioned boyfriend and enjoying a few days playing with the kids before Steven and I helped chaperon a New Year's Eve surprise birthday party and attended with the girls, who were charged with delivering the birthday girl to the party, and not getting to bed until 2 a.m. and getting up at 6:30 to pack the car and drive Chris and Michael back to Utah so Chris could get into his apartment and settle in two days before the Winter semester began at BYU and Michael could work a little more at Best Buy before has to report from SLC to go to boot camp and spending three days with Marianne before driving back to Colorado to spend one last day with the girls before they had to go back to school and I had to go to two days out of three the first week, subbing for teachers who had sick children and, thankfully, only working one day last week but it happened to fall on the ONE day a month where I curse the heavens, praying for a hysterectomy soon, and I've subbed two days this week for a special ed. class I've been in many times but the eight students have now decided our honeymoon is over and I came home mentally and physically exhausted only to find I haven't had time to grocery shop because we've entered HS musical season (Thoroughly Modern Millie) and the girls have needed to take the car on my days off so they can stay until, well, 6 last night, at auditions and they'll probably be longer tonight since last night was only monologues but tonight is the singing portion and tomorrow will be the dance audition so they'll have to be there until around 6 or 7 but since I've learned I'm going back to same special ed. class I'll need the car so we'll be picking then up at 6 or 7 and because of the lack of groceries dinner, which I really am not hungry enough to eat or interested in making, has become a true challenge and helping Helen make plane reservations to spend a month in Arizona and fly to Utah in time to say goodbye to Michael and I've been sitting on pins and needles waiting to see if Chris can get a job back on the same crew at the Wilkinson Center he worked with before his mission, the only job he could find that would give him enough hours to support himself since his parents, still reeling and catching up from their almost 7 months of unemployment last year and can't help him very much and I just found out he has an interview this evening so I end on good news!

I have today off. I've spent three hours on photos and blogging so far and Mom is begging me to go back the the psychiatrist to see if there can be a tweaking of my meds to help me out. I hate going to the psychiatrist but my Unipolar/ADD/Anxiety Disorder medication may need to be upped a little...

PLEASE believe I love you all and want to be part of your world, out where you walk, out where you run, out where you may or may not have sun.... But on my day off I'm having to go out, after I finish with you, to make sure my roof is fortified since the terrible, horrible, no good, very bad "varmint-cong" (thanks, Tyler) of squirreldom is trying to find a way to get in and nest, again!

And I still don't have a car. Or a haircut.